A Meme Served Up Just The Way You Like It

GlassOWater tagged me with this here meme.  He doesn’t tend to post on a regular basis, but when he does it is well worth reading.  If you haven’t already, be sure to check his place out.

The rules of the game:

RULE #1 : People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 : Tag 6 people to do this quiz and they cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

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1. If you were given the option to change questions on a meme, what would you do?

Well, I suppose I’d change some questions, you know, if they sucked, or if I just didn’t like them.

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2. If you have a dream you’d like to come true, what is it?

I’m going the literal route here.  I’ve had many a flying dream in my day.  That would be a kick ass dream to have come true.  I’d make a totally kick ass superhero, striking fear into the hearts of vandals everywhere, with my stick…  with a nail in it.

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3. Whose butt would you like to kick?

All of the parents of kids that are running around in age inappropriate hoochy momma apparel, and thugged out gansta gear.

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4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

What wouldn’t I do.  It’s a billion dollars, duh. My Bucket List would become a reality, that is for certain.

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5. Will your best friend always be your best friend?

Yes, and she’ll always be my wife too.

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6. Have you ever been in love with two people at once?

In love?  No.  In lust?  Could be.

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7. How long would you wait for someone you really loved?

At least two and a half years.  It’s only fair to return the favor. Eternity if necessary.

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8. If you won the lottery, would you quit your job?

HA!  I already quit my job, no lottery needed.    However, if I were working at the time I won the lottery, I would NOT quit my job.  That’s with the understanding that no one actually knew I had won.  I would get a kick out of pissing off people that always pissed me off in the past.  I mean hey, what are they gonna do?  Fire me?  Hahaha.

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9. Who is on your celebrity top 5…you know, the ones…that if you ever had an opportunity…

1. Jessica Alba

2. Fran Drescher (she’s have to take a vow of silence)

3. Kelly LeBrock (back in the “Weird Science” days)

4. Lucy Lui

5. Rosario Dawson

This was the hardest question for me.  I don’t keep a favorites list tucked away in the back my head.

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10. What sucks the life out of you?

Dealing with people I don’t want to deal with.  Being places I don’t want to be.  Financial matters.  Shopping with my wife. Just kidding on that last one.

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11. Where do you see yourself in ten years?

I can’t see near that far ahead.  I like to think I’ll be on top of the world, but I’ll settle for not being trapped under it.

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12. What’s your greatest fear/phobia?

Burning to death or drowning.  It’s a toss up.

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13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

I think GlassOWater is a good guy with a big heart.  He has an artistic side, a great love of music, and a sense of humor I can relate to.  But what the hell do I know?

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14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?

Married and poor.  If it ain’t broke, don’t try to fix it.

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15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Roll over and go back to sleep.  If that doesn’t pan out I head straight for the breakfast table or the toilet, whichever is calling me loudest.

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16. If everything in life has a purpose, what purpose does bellybutton lint and toe jam serve?

Bellybutton lint is actually a trait we are evolving away from.  Our ancestors of long ago would actually grow massive bellybutton afros which would then be spun into thread, and then made into clothing.  Since the invention of Wal Marts the bellybutton afros have been getting smaller and smaller, until all that remains is bellybutton lint.

I haven’t quite figured out the mystery of toe jam, but whoever is eating that shit on toast is one sick motherfucker.

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17. Is your career vitally important to you?

Hellooo…  can you say “unemployed”?  Clearly not my best career move ever.

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18. If the animal initiates the sexual act, is it still a crime?

Ummm…  what state are we talking about here? HA! hahahaha snort.

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19. Do you prefer masturbation, eating along, going to the movies along, not getting anything for Valentines Day, being the third wheel on dates, or being in a relationship?

Uhhh… relationships are nice.

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20. List 6 people to tag:

1. You, with the hippy shirt on.  You’re up.

2. You, you look like you could use a meme.  You can thank me later.

3. You, with the “every day is a bad hair day” hair.  With this meme people won’t even notice the hair.

4. You, with the “oh please pick me” look on your face.  Not a chance, but your friend there is welcome to it.

5. You, go take a shower, put on some clean clothes, and then do this meme.  And for god sakes, keep that horse in the stable.

6. You, no not you, YOU, don’t act like you don’t know I’m talking to you.  Yeah you, get to work.  It’s meme time.

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Anyone else interested?  Have at it.

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FYI: I changed the following questions: 1, 11 (just reworded it), 16, 18, and 19 (just reworded it). You can check out GlassOWater’s version of this meme to see the questions I originally started with.